I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
Do you have any booze?
Well I have 60 feet of bubble wrap and a bottle of wine...but I'm saving that for a special girl...
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
Dude I'm pretty sure everyone in my office knows I fucked our boss...can I ask for anything better?
Randomize