im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
This is a mass text: my birthday is tomorrow, and I want a full day of birthday sex. Send me your availabities. Time slots begin at noon
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
Randomize
