im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
That's when you crack a 10am beer
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize