New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
Randomize
