the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
The best thing about my promotion is that I now have an office with a door. I can take my naps in peace instead of leaning my head against the stall in the bathroom.
I can't believe they pay you six figures. I hate you.
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
Randomize
