I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
Randomize
