They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
I was pretending that it wasn't happening. Until we had to roll down the windows as she was vomiting apologies into a Target bag.
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
Randomize
