so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
You left your underwear on the fireplace
I'm having a staring contest with a raccoon.
Where the hell are you
He's winning.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
