Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
I'm chasing my vodka with snickers.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
I hate closet cases. I've been wooing this chick the entire quarantine. We finally meet up tonight, we're two drinks in, I've got my hand half way up her skirt and her husband calls. She promised to bring home dinner.
Randomize
