elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
you literally stared at me for three minutes and then said "hey this tequila isn't gonna drink itself, boss"
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
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