Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
Randomize
