Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
Randomize
