Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you.
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
he stole a smokey from the street meat vendor and put it in his pocket when she wasn't looking and now we're drinking avocado margaritas
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
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