absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
tonight is going to be epic. can you pre-book an ambulance?
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
I'm getting married
To pizza
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
Randomize