you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
I was going to ask the people in the kitchen to keep the volume down, but they're cooking pasta at 3 AM and one complimented me on my polka-dot nightgown. They're high. No volume control.
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize