Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
woke up this morning to find the entire staircase covered in marinara sauce, with my roommate practically sobbing and scrubbing the wall with carpet cleaner.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
To my ex and my favorite mistake: I totally enjoyed hearing you have erectile disfunction via baby monitor!
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize