I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
i don't plan on having that self control this summer
my three year anniversary of no dick sucking is coming up. you can throw me a party with a penis cake.
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
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