U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
Glad I put on jeans. You could measure my ass sweat with a rain guage.
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
ATMs should seriously have built in breathalysers, I would save so much money.
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
I'm gonna go drown myself in the shower. Make sure to cover me up before the paramedics arrive. I'm too fat to be seen naked right now.
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Randomize
