East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
ugly people sure do ruin things
Shes in the fridge organizing my beer collection. I love having a girlfriend with OCD
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
Randomize
