i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
Its really bad when you fall asleep at a stop light outside the hotel and you wake up to a small spanish limo driver knocking on your window to tell you it's a green light
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
Randomize
