I think scott just propositioned me for sex
fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
tod's in jail
he was afraid of holiday checkpoints so we let him ride my mom's tandem bike home. by himself. at 4 am.
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
i need to stop meeting underage girls and letting them into the bar. i mean yea its a surefire way to get laid without having to tell them I'm 26 but i feel like as a bouncer I'm focusing on all the wrong things
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
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