shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
Plan B is the new Plan A
Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
I just found a bag of teeth...
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
Randomize
