Having a random hookup so left but love u
At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
So I told him it takes a lot to get me drunk & he said he was the heavyweight champion in college. We high-fived. Obviously I'm the favorite child.
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
Randomize
