How many nights a week you wake up with sticky boxers cause you were dreaming of Clay Aiken? Your wife mad?
im on my way to getting "i just graduated college with no money, no job, and no plan" drunk
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
Randomize