yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
We were hooking up, both of us naked. She starts putting her clothes back on and says, "I have to go to the bathroom." I reply, "No you don't, you're leaving." Without hesitation she looks at me and says, "Yeah."
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
Sorry my hands just texted you
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
Randomize
