Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
You do realize I got a panda tattooed on my ass just to get you laid, right?
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
He was supposed to visit me tonight but he decided to stop in Tacoma so now I'm sitting on my bed naked eating oranges and candy corn while I watch Parks and Rec.
Now I have to hook up with him tomorrow DURING THE DAY.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
Dude, we got to the strip club as they were closing, and you starting crying because, and I quote, "This is the closest to birthday sex I'm gonna get."
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
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