I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
I took 20 bucks from you because when I woke up I saw more of you than I ever wanted to see bro.
Totally acceptable.
seis de mayo is my least favoite holiday because i usually spend it in bed sobbing over my poor life decisions from the night before.
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize