As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
Thing I actually said tonight: "I want to achieve Ultimate level drunkenness, I'm only at Champion"
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
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