just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
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