He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
My pants zipper is stuck halfway down. I have to interview an intern later. This day is gonna be amazing,
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
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