She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
Neighbor who got arrested at 3am just said he'd split the $ with me if I testify as the witness in his police brutality trial. He was also holding a baby and a case of beer.
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
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