32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
u know whats better than using ur vibrator? using it w/ jeopardy on in the background and half moaning the correct final jeopardy question. yeah that just happened.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
Welp, I just herniated a vocal cord during sex. How was your night?
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
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