she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
I rocked his world in the back of my car in an overly-lit, heavily trafficked parking lot. Middle age is amazing!
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
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