All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
