woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
we were shitfaced at work by 8pm. I had to stop myself from pouring vodka in everyone's cappuccino.
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
Randomize