He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize
