Taylor Swift is so right about you.
i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
If you asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be today, I can pretty much guarantee I wouldn't have replied with "buying hemorrhoid cream on Bourbon St at 7am"
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
I'm saying "I told you so" now so that I don't slow down to say it on the way to grab the fire extinguisher
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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