He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
If her picture on my phone wasn't mostly of her breasts, I'd never pick up the phone when she calls.
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
It was the best present I've gotten since I was 5 and I got a fucking easy bake oven. I'm not pregnant for realsies. Celebratory party at the house tonight. Invite all the nice dicks you know.
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
I'm pretty sure I broke my breathalyzer by breathing vaporized vodka into it.
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
Randomize