You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
im sitting in the back of my pickup eating an artichoke. please come find me, im scared.
that was a mass text, wasnt it?
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
So the woman who sold us weed at the park is pregnant. With another small child. And the basket she used to carry the joints is decorated with Barney stickers.
She's like a yuppie Nancy Botwin. She just gets better and better.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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