4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
Someone played tic tac toe on my abs?
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
You can't text people with drinkers' regret at 8 in the morning. It's just bad form.
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
When you're trying to sneak from the bathroom to your room with dildo, but it glows in the dark and suddenly your entire life is illuminated in the shape of dick
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
Randomize
