I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
Hey, um, after thinking about it, I decided I really don't want to use applying olive oil to your ass for your fissure as part of foreplay because... well... really? Just read that again.
Randomize
