plz talk dirty to me
Why is it that every time I type the word "give" my phone spells out HIV?! You know how many people i've told I want to HIV them something!
nailed a girl as she was wearing a darth vader shirt. Cross that one off my list.
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
Randomize