If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
He was so drunk last night. He woke up out of a dead sleep at 330am, walked over to the dresser, opened his middle drawer and proceeded to pee. When I woke up and asked him Wtf he was doing, he told me it was fake pee and blamed it on the cat...we don't have a cat
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