Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
I just found out that my husband and I are Eskimo siblings. What in the actual fuck?!
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
Just realized I've spent more nights sleeping on bathroom floors the last two weeks than in my own bed. It's time to reevaluate my life.
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