i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
I sent my roommate a text from MY phone that said, "I don't know where my phone is." Must've been a good night.
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
Randomize