brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
I need something that says "I'm gay sometimes but I feel scorned by my straight, non-committal lover, so I'm here to get drunk and make out, and possibly end up in a bathroom with someone who's name I won't remember tomorrow"
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
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