he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
Randomize