haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
Walking down the street at 11 pm dressed in bubble wrap. Why is the bar so fucking far away??
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
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