apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
I can feel you judging me through the phone.
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
Randomize
