Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
I love black thongs
he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
Dammit. I drunkenly drank all my milk at 6 AM in a misguided stupor to prevent my roommates from stealing my milk.
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
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