She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
I am a mess. Weirdest thing: I woke up with a hammer under my pillow. No idea why.
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
Tornado booty call.. dedication
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